Training Day

“For a Play to become successful, there has to be bad luck beforehand!” (Orson Welles)

Today, I went through the training session in the assecioning role at the Covid lab in Randox. The work itself seems simple enough. However, life in the major obstacle.

  1. I arrived three hours early due to my anxiety levels being through the roof.
  2. I found it well-nigh impossible to pay attention to the class. The demonstration and practice runs were Godsends.
  3. I was lost at the main car park; trying to find my car – parked elsewhere. Had it not been for my walking-stick, I would have fallen and broken my spine. (insurance mightn’t have covered me) It’s probably part of my autism; digging ones toes in when walking due to sensitive feet.
  4. The roads are frosty, and my local roads wouldn’t be gritted. I’m learning new driving skills as I go along, but the longer I drive the more nervous I become. (I can’t afford to make a claim)

Living in the moment can be a thankless task for myself. But I have an understanding group of people on my side.

Going crazy

I feel that yesterday was a pivotal moment in my life. On Tuesday night, I had ZERO sleep. Then I only had a forty-minute nap. Then I went berserk; after heading to a friend’s place to borrow his laptop (my MacBook Pro has a damaged charger, and I can’t afford a replacement, yet) and I was about to go on a rampage.

My complementary therapist recommended Magnesium supplements for my sleep. I got that. Also, I went to a chemist and got elderberry tablets. For £14.99! (WTF?)

I am putting in so much effort for so little return. How much longer must this continue?

Tunes:

Getting agitated

Today, I was on the Community Bus home, whenever a news headline triggered me, and I began tapping the back of the seat in front of me in agitation. That seat happened to be the driver’s, and she said it was ‘distracting’ her. I got home safely, but I still feel wired.

Yesterday’s shopping trip was a bit of a blow-out. However, I bought Christmas lights at the branch of Dobbie’s Garden Centre outside Lisburn. We stopped for breakfast there. I wasn’t aware that they provided breakfast for us, and I had already paid for one. But I got both breakfasts, and this morning I lost a pound in Slimming World. 🙂

I did buy a twelve-inch single in Belfast, during the trip. It was from Flowered Up – London’s answer to the Happy Mondays. Music was coming into my life around the end of the Baggy era. I once got a bicycle bell for Christmas, with a smiling yellow face. Being a good Catholic boy, I took it off for fear of the drug connotations. 🙂 A misspent youth, with hindsight.

I’m also listening to a Van Morrison LP, a friend lent to me. Also, I’m trying out the Vivaldi browser; developed by Opera, but emulates as Chrome. Good on the MacBook. Not so good on the Android.

Tunes:

 

Having to give up driving

On Sunday afternoon, I was returning home from a Gaelic Football game whenever I suffered a meltdown, and only God’s grace prevented an accident. Then, yesterday – Tuesday, I was getting a taxi home from a bus from Belfast whenever I had a case of PTSD and grabbed the driver’s steering wheel impulsively. His response was, “Don’t do that, again! If you’re that nervous with my driving, you shouldn’t be driving, yourself!”

That was when it suddenly clicked. I CANNOT maintain a car with the income I currently have. I plan to sell my car by placing it at the car park of a local gift shop with a ‘For Sale’ sign that I ordered from Amazon. Hopefully, someone will buy it. The Car Salesman I contacted, who’s related to me, said the mileage is too high for him to trade the car.

However, I know that this is the last house on the street for me. Just like my own home. 😐

Tunes:

 

Losing Weight

Three weeks ago, I was hospitalised after sensory overload. I have been on the hamster wheel quite a while, recently. However, what emerged from that is an awareness of my limitations. For the four Wednesday evenings of June, I will be attending Pilates classes in Holywood (North Down, in case you might be searching for me on IMDb) and hope to join the local sessions in Coagh once it resumes in September.

Also, a fortnight ago, my car got through the MOT. Having heard about the daughter of my ex-Landlady from Dublin spending over €1,000 on repairs for the Southern equivalent and still not getting the car passed, I can be thankful that I have good people in my local community who won’t rip me off. But, yesterday, the service light was on, and the car needs to be seen to, again, on Monday.

Last Sunday, I went to the Continental Market in Cookstown. Really glad to have gone. I had a Brautwrst hotdog there from the German stall and Grilled Chicken with Sweet-Potato Fries fries from the Spanish booth. My three weeks of Slimming World have gone well. Three-quarters of a stone – aka ten and a half pounds – lost, already. 🙂

Tonight, I’ll be seeing Superstars Café’s team do a stage production of ‘The Lion King’. Hopefully, on Tuesday evening – if the car will be fine – I will see the Elton John film in Cookstown Cinema. Things are better now. 🙂

 

Tunes:

 

Going Berserk today – Asperger Meltdown

On Monday I left a negative review on Amazon for a DVD of SAGE accounts which didn’t arrive and I thought was another phantom purchase, only for the seller to call me yesterday morning. ‘Sam’ (who’s really an Indian Lady) mentioned that it was at Stewartstown Post Office – our local sorting office – so I went there and signed for the order. Then I got the software installed on my Windows 7 partition of my Dell Laptop.

All fine and dandy, until this afternoon when – in the middle  of a cyber errand – Sam called me again. I was ratty and told her not to call me again in a fit of rage. In the end she messaged me requesting that I remove the negative review. I did that and sent a message of apologies. However, I promised a positive review. But it keeps getting turned down by Amazon’s moderators. Such is life. 🙂

This makes me a little self-conscious because I was already hot and flustered when my printer stopped working – must be a damaged USB lead – and I went berserk. When I was living in Dun Laoghaire during my placement year I was evicted for being histrionic in a way that upset the other tenants. Memories came flooding back of the time at one stage when someone was about to call the Police because of me. It was a ‘Community Watch’ area. One striking memory I have of that estate was seeing people practice Tai Chi on Sunday mornings. I had one Tai Chi class in Antrim about two and a half years ago and only lasted about forty minutes. Impatience is my middle name. 🙂

Hopefully tomorrow will be better. I head to Specialisterne in Belfast to speak to a graphic design mentor. I’ll be there from 2 pm to 4 pm. Hopefully I’ll knock him dead. 🙂

This coming Saturday night I will be watching ‘Give my Head Peace’ Live at a Theatre in Enniskillen, County Fermanagh. If you wouldn’t laugh about this country, you’d cry. 🙂